Imperfection
by OnlyMostlyHarmless
Summary: Severus Snape and Lily Evans' odd friendship and its breaking throughout the years.


Disclaimer: The Harry Potter series and the lovely characters within are not mine.

Imperfection

_1969_

Lily stood up and giggled at him. "C'mon, Sev, one more time!"

He let his head fall back onto the grass and groaned. "This proves that Petunia is evil," he mumbled. The rhyme was alright the first time. By the tenth, Severus had gotten bored and his elbows were raw from falling.

He agreed reluctantly. "Okay Lily. Last time, though." He got up and held his hands out. Lily grabbed them and started twirling and chanting.

"Ring around the rosy, a pocket full of posies, ashes, ashes, we all fall DOWN!"

And they collapsed on the grass, out of breath, but happy.

~`o~`o~`o~`o~

_1972_

Severus sat in the compartment, waiting for Lily. His mother had dropped him off at Kings Cross with plenty of time to spare, and now, he was looking out the window and waiting impatiently for Lily to finish saying her good-byes. He hunched into the seat, trying to ignore the fact that he was probably the only person sitting by himself, unable to stop the irrational feeling that Lily would want to sit with Mary instead. Before he could dwell further on the miseries of life, she barged in, smiling.

"Hi, Sev!" He gave her a small smile and returned the greeting.

"Guess what I found in Slug and Jiggers!" She had levitated her trunk onto the rack and was now digging around in her pockets, finding a packet and hiding it behind her back.

Severus smirked. "Potions ingredients, perhaps?"

She pouted and repeated, "Guess!" She dangled the small paper packet in front of him.

He lunged for the packet and Lily skipped nimbly out of his way, resulting in Severus trying to change direction and tripping.

It was obvious that Lily was trying to stifle a smile as she said magnanimously, "Well, since you're my best friend, I suppose I can tell you." She paused for a dramatic effect. "I found psoralea seeds."

His eyes widened and he grinned. "Potions project?"

She affirmed. "Potions project. Won't old Sluggy be proud when we hand in the best healing salves?"

~`o~`o~`o~`o~

_1978_

He shuffled his feet at the Evans' doorstep, waiting for someone to respond to the knock. Lily had apparently ignored his written apologies, so he had gathered his courage and tattered confidence and gone to apologize in person. Again. Maybe she would have calmed down.

His heart rose as Lily answered the door and then sank again as she glared at him. "What are you doing here?" she asked, disgust dripping from her voice.

"I – I came to say that I'm sorry," his voice had gone hoarse, but he continued, "I shouldn't have called you – well, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry." His little speech sounded pathetic, but for the life of him, Severus couldn't remember what he had wanted to say.

Her tone was chilling. "Severus. You know that we were already going our separate ways. I could forgive you for calling me a Mudblood if I knew that you realized _why_ it's wrong. You're so wrapped up in your little Dark Arts projects that I hardly know who you are anymore!" Lily's voice had risen to a scream, "You don't understand anything, no matter how much I try to explain, and –."

Lily appeared to calm down suddenly, shaking her head. "I don't want to see you here again."

As Severus quietly said "But, Lily, I love - ", Lily slammed the door in his face. He finished the sentence to the door, each word tasting like ashes on his tongue. "I love you Lily."

~`o~`o~`o~`o~

_1981_

_"The Potter's are dead. Their baby - Harry - survived though? Did you hear that? He defeated You-Know-Who!" _The echoes of the Hogsmeade villagers' voices vibrated through his mind as he slammed his dungeon door.

If he had to hear the jubilant whisperings of the crowd one more time, he would go mad. Did these people have no decency? Even he, James Potter's longest standing enemy, had enough decorum not to rejoice over his death.

That vague annoyance turned to rage as he contemplated Lily's death. How _dare_ they? How dare they drink wine and celebrate as though…as though his world had not just fallen apart.

And the most outrageous event of them all: Harry Potter's survival. Severus clenched his jaw, refusing to let a sob escape. She had _died_ for that ungrateful spawn. He hiccupped and blindly grasped for a bottle of Dreamless Sleep.

As he passed into oblivion, Severus Snape was certain of one fact - that Harry Potter's first offence was an unforgivable one.

* * *

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